Monday, January 04, 2010

the island of misfit pregnancies

"as a voting bloc, aborted fetuses are very consistent. My Kind Of People!"

it happens occasionally, as it must, that a blogpost is begun but never finished. perhaps max steele already posted THE EXACT SAME THING. maybe mommy just doesn't want it anymore. whatever the cause, these are Love's leftovers.

left a little too late, this holiday-themed fiction is what the law would consider "partially born." i might have saved her for a different christmas but supreme court nominee hearing references just don't keep. perhaps it will offer insight into my "process." "pro," from the latin, meaning "in favor of," and "cess," meaning "poop." here we go...

the synecdochetic holidays are here!

Synecdochetic Holiday Story

One very old night, two wise men and a wise Latino woman were prospecting for oil in a demilitarized zone. They had stopped for some bumps of frankincense when, all of a sudden, a faggot with wings chass├ęd out from behind a sand dune.

"Be amazed, for I am a Faggot of the Lord bearing tidings of Fabulous News! To you is born this day in the City of David a Savior, who is the Messiah, the Lord! The King of Kings. The Son of God, sent to bring Peace and Love to this demilitarized zone. Other people are gonna move here just to raise their kids in this demilitarized zone. It'll be paradise again! But only if you and all of your friends believes in him."

"This sounds like a pyramid scheme," observed the wise Latino woman.

"I gonna bitch-smite yo ass. Just kidding! Ha ha ha. It's about love. HE LOVES YOU! I just told you there's a messiah baby out there who loves you. Now here's what you're gonna do about it: travel to the City of David, guided by light of yonder star. There will you find the babe, swaddled in swaddling amongst humble barnyard animals. Make him presents of frankincense, myrrh, and any other Schedule I spices you're hiding in that camel's ass. Now go and spread the Fabulous News: the Savior is born!"

And as he came, the faggot left: skipping like a gay little faggot. The three wise people, having some experience with these sorts of situations, mounted their caravan for the twinkling pink star hung high in the North sky.

Movement Two

In a demilitarized zone not too far away, three child service workers were servicing children...
that's all i got. happy 2010 everybody!