Thursday, November 30, 2006

Any Post

I am the reason for the Universe, though not the cause.

I'm still plowing through video from Beyond Belief. I'm on session five right now. Very interesting. I loved Ann Druyan's remarks at the end of session four, but I think the man to whom she was responding was a ringer ;). Carolyn Porco gave one of my favorite presentations and made the fascinating point that we all know what death is like: it's just like before we were born.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

DNA's Downside

We can only become what we are able to be.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

The Word of Dog

New Scientist: Science is interesting and if you don't agree, you can fuck off.

I love you, Rich

Monday, November 27, 2006

Turkey Wrap(up)

I flew Home on Wednesday. Brittany and I saw Borat. She didn't much care for it.

The family piled in the car and drove to Kansas City Missouri to see my Dad's brother's family. They have three children: Alison (my age), Josh (my sister's age) and Baily (three years younger still). Alison visited us four-odd years ago and we hadn't seen the others for a long time. They are all very old. Aunt Carole made a fine Thanksgiving diner and we retired to play Frisbee and pool. It's a fun bunch.

Alison and I did the crossword in a local paper (we finished). We played Mario Cart and pool and more Frisbee (which spellcheck is telling me ought to be capitalized. I never knew). We had diner at a great local pizeria. Kansas City has a quaint little Main St. area. Then it was back to the house for more pool and some movies. Forty Year Old Virgin lasted a few minutes before the old folks found it too inappropriate. The Nightmare Before Christmas was next and I had forgotten how short a movie it is. After that, I finally got my way and Vertigo was put on. That is a long movie.

Six hour drive back home. Brittany came over late and we yucked and talked into the wee hours.

Back to NY. The Gym was closed. Waaa! Rehearsal was tedious in the extreme. Afterward, I stayed up until five watching video from the Beyond Belief conference which was Nov 5-7.

I woke up at 2:30 and was late for 2pm rehearsal. No one noticed. I have 7-10 rehearsal in an hour and I'm writing this blog post instead of going to the gym. I'll have to go after rehearsal. That's bad because the gym closes at 11, but good because there won't be so many people there.

An Occasion on the 26th of Nov

Today marks a year of uninterrupted follicle growth on my head.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006


I was in a hurry yesterday and I needed some serious calcium. I popped into a university shop and found a single bottle in the fridge, labeled only "Milk." It looked good to me. Well, while waiting for the subway, I cracked open this beverage and discovered, to my utter shock, it was whole! Worse still, I liked it!!!

Today, catastrophe! I am at the dining hall, cup in hand, facing the milk machine. I have a choice: skim or whole. Both are available, both are fresh. My hand moves to the "Whole" lever, filling my cup to the brim. I drink it all. I am ashamed.

I don't know when - or if - I will return to skim, but I am confident of one thing: An old man will look back on the tatters of his ruined life and recognize this as the very moment which began the downward spiral.

Sunday, November 12, 2006

"Things that make you big" for 500!

Working out is a lot like masturbating: you look at sexy people while performing a repetitive motion that makes you feel both good and sticky.

Saturday, November 11, 2006


A man is wandering in the desert of the apocalypse when he comes across a machine. He says, "Do you have any water?" The machine replies, "No, but I am waiting for the Culligan man." The man asks, "Is the Culligan man coming soon?" and the machine tells him, "Very," so the man sits down to wait. The next day, the man dies from dehydration. Some billion years later, after the Universe has ended, God is walking through Heaven when he comes across the machine. God says, "Do you have any faith?" The machine replies, "No, but I am waiting for the Culligan man." God asks, "Are you sure he is coming?" and the machine tells God, "Very." Some eternities later, after Heaven has ended, the machine is walking through Chaos when it comes across a blue jacket and hat. The machine dons the clothing and Chaos says, "Hey Culligan Man!"

The moral of the story: Machines don't get thirsty.
Further reading: Transhumanism and the dilemmas of space travel.

No Title

A perfect human world is a world without humans.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Dems in Da House

And apparently in the Senate too. And then I heard Rummie was out, and I did a happy dance!

Tuesday, November 07, 2006


Happy anniversary blog! A year ago today, Phil Martin was kicked out of studio, Sherin had a birthday, I jacked off and did laundry, and Manos Hands of Fate was enjoyed by all.

Today, I skipped a class to take a nap, Sherin had a birthday, and the country voted. Maybe I'll jerk off in a bit.

This year has been up and down for me and I've blogged through it all. Reading over old posts, I vividly remember certain things and have no recollection of others. Through good or bad, the blog encourages me to remember, provokes me to write, and incentivises interesting, blog-worthy behavior. Its a resource I will further cherish with each passing year. If you don't already, may I recommend you give this blogging thing a go. Let me know if you do: lunchtimemama at gmail dot com. What are you up to? What do you think? What are you? Do something worth blogging about!

As for the next year, I've got some great stuff coming up. More antidotes, epithets, poems, pearls of ignorance and turds of wisdom. I've also got a project in the works for you, dear reader, that should be done around next May. There's another thing that I hope to tell you about sooner. December-ish. Look for it all in the year to come. I'll see you there.

"We're not looking for the best, we're looking for the famousest."

Saturday, November 04, 2006


I don't fully understand the psycho-socio mechanism by which the gym is always packed on Friday nights. Whatever. Last night was amazing. I first thought $10 was too steep for a fund-raiser party, but it was the most fun I've had in a long damn time. Yeah. It was just awesome.

"I don't believe it's selfish to eat defenseless shell fish." -NOFX


Some poops are bad. Some are good. That one was very good!